OK. It is 1:05 as I am posting this. I cannot sleep at all. Period. I feel a lot of stress and anxiety building up inside me. I've loved this girl since January, and when I texted her, I found out she broke up with her boyfriend. But there was a catch. She was taken advantage of, then the boyfriend cheated. Out of anger, she followed his footsteps and took it even further. I still legitimately have feelings for her. I do not want her for sexual fulfillment. But as of now, she is not looking at anyone for a relationship because of the incident. I texted her until midnight, starting from about 10:15, and there is something inside me telling she lost a bit of interest. Yeah, she needs plenty of time to recover, and I fully recognize this. But I'm just afraid when she's over it, she will lose feelings altogether. She doesn't want to risk our friendship. Once again, I do not look at women for dirty desires. But I have been breathing heavily for the past hour, thinking about whether I will live in darkness for yet another year. Older girls have tried taking advantage of me in the past, and it leaves me paranoid. The only cure I see is the kiss of a girl I genuinely care about, and she feels like the only one for me. Not many girls at my high school are sensible enough to recognize that people like me are the type of people they should have for themselves. I am respectful, intelligent, athletic, and pretty damn good-looking. But what do I do? I feel like slitting my wrists to help me sleep, but that will not work out well with the people close to me. I haven't done self-harm or attempted suicide in several months. I feel like a cornered rat with no way out. The only way for me to escape my problems is through her, or pain and minor bloodshed. What do I do? Someone please help me.