So there's one liter of [b]mountain dew[/b]. There are [u]three men[/u] fighting over it, one of them is you. Each man starts with a [b]chicken wing[/b]. The fight begins and hopefully you will win. But the real question is will you [b]eat the chicken[/b] wing or will you[b] use it to fight[/b].
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Eat wing (it better be a drumstick). Sharpen bone with teeth. While other two are wrestling and slapping each other with their wings, stab one in throat, then dick punch the other like its saints row. Grab Mountain Dew. T-bag unconscious loser, hump the dead one, and chortle as you do a leg-to-leg dance.