If it's the former, why do they complain that "chivalry is dead" when it's their own fault for wanting to be treated the same as men? Why do men still hold the door open, pull the seat out, pay the tab, and be forced to sleep on the couch when things don't go their way? Why do they have a problem with being treated the same and a problem with being treated differently?
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The two aren't mutually exclusive. You can have equal rights and be treated with courtesy typically extended to a woman. People aren't equal but should be treated like human beings all the same.