While waiting for a train I made eye contact with a subway rat that was as big as one of my cats. “Join us,” he said “When the train comes we slide under the tracks and feel it rumble over us like a warm thunderstorm. We live forever and we love to live.” Tears began to fill my eyes as he spoke. After what seemed like an eternity grappling with my thoughts I responded “I’m sorry my friend. I can’t, I’m too large.” The rat frowned and went underneath the subway tracks just as the train arrived. I wept the entire ride home. How could I have turned down an offer to experience paradise? What joys and pleasures of the flesh could I have experienced? Alas, I am a human and he was a rat. It’s been three days since that life changing experience and I keep telling myself that it never would have worked out. But could it have? I will never know.