Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of users from the Downvote Brigade with horned helmets on. A Banned and his Lurker enter.
Banned: You sit here, Lurker.
Lurker: All right.
Banned: Morning!
Ninja: Morning!
Banned: Well, what've you got?
Ninja: Well, there's lock and report; lock repost and report; lock and Porch; lock report and Porch; lock report repost and Porch; Porch report repost and Porch; Porch lock Porch Porch report and Porch; Porch repost Porch Porch report Porch tomato and Porch;
Downvote Brigade (starting to chant): Porch Porch Porch Porch...
Ninja: ...Porch Porch Porch lock and Porch; Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch Domino’s Pizza Porch Porch Porch...
Downvote Brigade (singing): Porch! Lovely Porch! Lovely Porch!
Ninja: ...or Lobster Thermidor au Crevette with a Mornay sauce served in a Provencale Bannedner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried lock on top and Porch.
Lurker: Have you got anything without Porch?
Ninja: Well, there's Porch lock repost and Porch, that's not got much Porch in it.
Lurker: I don't want ANY Porch!
Banned: Why can't she have lock report Porch and repost?
Lurker: THAT'S got Porch in it!
Banned: Hasn't got as much Porch in it as Porch lock repost and Porch, has it?
Downvote Brigade: Porch Porch Porch Porch (crescendo through next few lines)
Lurker: Could you do the lock report Porch and repost without the Porch then?
Ninja: Urgghh!
Lurker: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like Porch!
Downvote Brigade: Lovely Porch! Wonderful Porch!
Ninja: Shut up!
Downvote Brigade: Lovely Porch! Wonderful Porch!
Ninja: Shut up! (Downvote Brigade stop) Bloody Downvote Brigade! You can't have lock report Porch and repost without the Porch.
Lurker (shrieks): I don't like Porch!
Banned: Sshh, Lurker, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your Porch. I love it. I'm having Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch beaked beans Porch Porch Porch and Porch!
Downvote Brigade (singing): Porch Porch Porch Porch. Lovely Porch! Wonderful Porch!
Ninja: Shut up!! Domino’s Pizza are off.
Banned: Well could I have her Porch instead of the Domino’s Pizza then?
Ninja: You mean Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch Porch... (but it is too late and the Downvote Brigade drown her words)
Downvote Brigade (singing elaborately): Porch Porch Porch Porch. Lovely Porch! Wonderful Porch! Porch Po-o-o-o-orch Porch Po-o-o-o-orch Porch. Lovely Porch! Lovely Porch! Lovely Porch! Lovely Porch! Lovely Porch! Porch Porch Porch Porch!
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Wait until Biggus Dickus hears of this!